You Could Tell Her
by WhiteMoon56
Summary: Cole knows who Solas really is. He also knows someone who could help, if only he would tell her.


_"…You could tell her. She might understand. And the pain would come untangled. It's all twisted, old. Like a gnarled root. Bright, bleeding, burning. Lost."_

"No. That is not a burden I want her to bear. She endures enough."

 _"It's more than that._ _ **A wolf regards the halla with sad eyes. The halla bends to brush noses.**_ _She wants to help. Why won't you let her?"_

"She would try to save me. I cannot be saved. It is far too late."

 _"You say that, but your words sing wrong. A lie, told daily to justify itself._ _ **If I lose her, the world lacks light. Yet I bring darkness with each passing day.**_ _"_

"Cole. Please."

 _"It worries her. She sees the pain in your eyes when you're alone. You don't hide it as well as you think. She's smart. But you know that."_

"…I cannot give her the truth. To tell her that I am… the great enemy of her people? It would destroy her."

 _"But she is strong. You know that too._ _ **She's brilliant, glowing against the world. Beautiful. But here to catch her if she falls. I was the one that pushed.**_ _"_

"Yes. She is. And I did. It matters little now, either way."

 _"You don't want to hurt people. I can tell. You're not that kind of wolf._ _ **He's quiet but strong, content to watch and listen. Gentle. But his eyes, always sad. Never explains. I don't ask.**_ _…Your pain hurts her, though. She's becoming tangled in the root."_

"She has nothing to do with that. I am to blame."

 _"But the orb marked her. Made her brighter. Placed the Inquisition on her shoulders._ _ **"I'm an elf standing for Thedas. The Inquisition is for all."**_ _I felt her fear. Guilt over the losses at Haven._ _ **Screams in the dark. Smoke in the sky. Burning, crying. I can't save them all. He's here for me, for the mark. Creators…"**_

"Stop, Cole. No more."

 _"You have to let her help. Hurt flows both ways. She cannot heal others if the one she really wants to aid refuses it."_

"She will be fine. She… has to be. I have chosen my path."

 _"Those words were more honest. But the song was still out of tune. Lying brings hurt, Solas. Do you want to hurt me? You're my friend."_

"Of course I am, Cole. I meant no harm. I apologize. I…"

 _"You fear what the truth will change._ _ **The light fades to darkness, distrust. The halla no longer looks at the wolf with love. She shies, slips, stumbles. Shivers with terror**_ _."_

"…She trusts a lie. Loves a man she truly knows nothing about. Apprehension is natural. And it is… all my fault."

 _"Words sing true, honest. Cries to the moon for guidance. Silence responds."_

"Indeed. So it would seem."

 _"She doesn't think that, though. She won't. Ever._ _ **A loss, behind the calm in his eyes. Something hidden, painful. Won't easily see the light. …He will tell me, eventually. For now, his heartbeat is enough**_ _."_

"…She is unlike any other, certainly. She is…"

 ** _"Real. Pure. Bright. Gentle. Beautiful. So beautiful. Able to bear the Mark and its burdens with a grace and wisdom unseen since… before._** _She fascinates you. She changes things."_

"…Everything. But I made a decision. I cannot stray."

 ** _"Lie tastes bitter, sings sour. Maybe she'll prove me wrong._** _You want her to. Yet no reason would be enough. The hurt tangles with the love, snags, snaps. I'm sorry."_

"You have done nothing to warrant apology."

 _"I'm only trying to help. But it's so ancient, twisted, now joined to hers and joined to this world's. Loosening creates room for more. Tugging creates knots. I don't understand."_

"Perhaps it is not a pain you alone can heal."

 _"…Compassion alone is not enough. More._ _ **Soft hands and shining eyes. Scent of trees and lilacs. Ar lath ma, vhenan. A smile. A whisper.**_ _She wants to help. You could tell her."_

"I… cannot."

 _"_ _ **The wolf follows the halla, watching, protecting. Others cry out, trapped in a mirror beyond reach. She becomes prey. Sacrifice her to redeem himself, or sacrifice redemption to save her.**_ _"_

"She will live as long as possible. I will ensure that."

 ** _"World burns, Veil shredded. Her voice on the wind, pained. Lost amid the smoke. I can't find her. I've lost her. Losing her would…"_**

 ****"An argument with you is not a battle I can win."

 _"It hurts you. That thought. Warping, wailing. Turning circles in the root. A future with unforeseen outcomes. Not part of the plan._ _ **All of this was not part of the plan.**_ _"_

"What little plan I had was abandoned long before her. One like her could not have been predicted."

 ** _"She sleeps, breathing steadily, the Mark pulsing on her hand. How is she alive? The orb should have killed her._** _You do not want her dead now. Now, more than the Mark gives you reason to stay, see if she succeeds._ _ **Ready to catch her if she falls.**_ _"_

"…Yes. But I will not remain long after."

 _"Leaving will hurt her._ _ **The halla wanders the woods, searching, waiting. Empty. Alone. The wolf deceived. The wolf lied. The wolf left."**_

 ****"I have no choice."

 _"She will wait."_

"No. She mustn't."

 _"But she will. You can't stop her._ _ **Fingers entwined, afraid he'll disappear again. Worried he wasn't going to come back. Fading, like a dream.**_ _Belief is strong. Love, stronger. She'll understand. She'll break if you stay silent. Shattered, jagged pain. Hard to loosen, set free. I may not be enough."_

"She'll… forget, in time. I'll become a memory. Nothing more. The way it should be."

 ** _"More lies ache, crack. Now I lie for her, as well. She won't forget. Her indomitable spirit will remember, linger, pursue._** _You wish the lies were true. Part of you does, at least. More knots. More tangles. Stop."_

"I cannot tell her. I cannot forget her. And I must leave her. For her own sake."

 _"…I tried, Solas. Compassion was not enough."_

"I know, Cole. I do not believe anything ever will be."


End file.
